Motherlover.

Oh hey, It’s mama’s day.  Do you appreciate your mama’s? I bet you do, and so you got her something, right? Like a card, a hug, breakfast in bed, a single tootsie roll, or even a one-hundred and twenty dollar gift card to a salon & spa. I bet whatever you got your mama, she’ll appreciate that you appreciate her even if it is stupid – as long as it’s not my mama.

 Guys. I wish I had happier things to post, but happier things don't exist. or aren't interesting enough to write about. Quintessential example: I had a cupcake yesterday. 

Once upon a time, mama locomotif asked, “Why don’t you buy me presents for my birthday/holidays? You always get your friends shit. All you get me is a card. whine whine whine nag.”

So I got her something other than a card this year. Twas a.. dun dun dun… gift card to a salon/spa ! Her reaction was: “Omg.. you’re so stupid. Return this shit.”

My heart went pfftsts and them tears flowed. Why? Cus she said: “Shoulda gotten me a card instead.”

Da fuck old woman.